Still in Recovery

I couldn't believe how much that half kicked my butt! I slept 11 hours on Sunday night and I was still exhausted on Monday. I fell asleep on my sofa around 7pm!

Today was tough getting back into the swing of things with work. My body wasn't too sore, but I was just physically exhausted. I was thinking of taking a yoga class, but it would have been pushing it to get there right from work. I did get to the pool tonight and that was great. I got in a full mile and I feel really good.

I'm still super tired and drained, but the swim was good. I worked my muscles without the impact of running and it was a great way to get back into training. Tomorrow night I am hitting the gym right from work. I looked at my schedule and I had it down for 7 miles. Not sure if I can handle that tomorrow, but I will get in at least 5. I'm hoping for 7 though but I would be happy with 5.

Then Thursday is back at the pool, Friday off and Saturday is a long run day. I'm still nervous about the long runs. I need to figure out what works best for me. I know the little walking breaks help me mentally and give me the push to keep going.

The plan for Saturday on my schedule is a 12 mile run. So my 3 mile loop 4 times around! URGH! I have to see if any of my friends will be around to meet me and help me out with getting through it. It is a good loop with rolling hills. But I just struggle at it alone and I'm not confident enough to join in with the FitCorp long runs in Boston. I know I'm too slow and I'm not advanced enough. I know I'm behind where I should be.

That scares me too. I KNOW I'm not where I should be in training. I KNOW I should be running further and harder than I do. I could make excuses... that's easy. Some people are just nature runners. I am not. I had to do the Couch to 5K three times to run my first 5K all the way through without any walking! That was a big deal for me! I remember the first time I ran 5 miles at the track without stopping. I was SO excited!

So tomorrow... 5 miles on the treadmill would be fine. I know I can do that straight without stopping comfortably. I just have to figure out how to push that and continue with the long runs.

I'm still scared. I'm still nervous. And I'm still insecure about my running. But with each run, I get stronger and closer. I know it is mental. I need to get my mind in the right place. That's hard to do when you are insecure about what you are doing, but I'm trying. Slowly but surely, I will get there.